Sharmaji series jokes…. Doctors
(Sharmaji series : (TM) all copyrights reserved by Abhimanyu Bishnu - violators will be subjected to a very high dose of laughter and yoga therapy by a well-known yoga guru from Haridwar :( )
" So how are you feeling today, Mr. Sharma? ", asked the bespectacled goatied doctor .
" Ah, doctor, I feel......so low" , replied the patient lying on the couch.
" Low? What do you mean ?"
" You know, that sinking feeling. No one loves me, no one cares for me any more."
"And?" pressed the knowledgeable psychiatrist.
" Voices in my head.Buzzing all the time"
" And?"
" Headaches."
By now, the doc's eyes were gleaming.
" Did you take the pills, Mr. Sharma?"
" Which ones, doc?"
" The ones for your depression. You know, the red ones, the blue ones and the yellow ones."
" That's precisely the problem, doc. I keep forgetting to take them . My memory has been going down the drain ever since I started taking those pills."
" What do you mean" by now, doc was on high alert.
" Side..........effects. I was reading in a journal."
" Trash!! Just throw away the journals. Why do you read rubbish ?"
" Doc......." Mr. Sharma stammered, " What about my loss of libido?"
" Ah, let me see" , the knowledgeable doc took out a lengthy tome," Hmmm" , he looked up from the book, spectacles nicely placed like a pair of gleaming owls," Sigmund Freud is of the unanimous opinion that this is due to your Id, Ego and Superego colliding with each other."
" But what does that mean, doc?"
" Mr. Sharma" , the wise doc looked at him gravely as a school headmaster might look at his errant pupil, " Your bipolar is back. . Together with your schizophrenia ."
" Doc..,..my wife ran away with my best friend." .Mr. Sharma was almost in tears.
" Ah... that is your cause for your depression getting aggravated. "
" Do you have a cure, doc? " Sharmaji was desperate now.
" Don't you worry, Mr. Sharma. The new pills in the market. The latest research shows that the green and yellow ones are far superior to what you are taking now ."
" How long do I need to take them , doc?"
" Lifelong . Or probably indefinitely. But you will get well, I assure you " Dr. Chowdhury ,DPM, MD, DNB , MRCPsych et cetera , looked at poor Mr. Sharma as a tiger would look at his prey.
" What about the earlier pills, doc?"
" Throw them away."
" What about the costs?" Mr. Sharma pressed, " I spent a fortune on those."
" Collateral costs, Mr.Sharma. The price of keeping well. On second thoughts, give them to me. I will use them for my poor patients."
" Poor patients? They buy these drugs?"
" Latest research, Mr. Sharma" , said the wise doc, " the price of keeping well."
By now, Mr. Sharma, diagnosed over the years with depression, mania, bipolar disorder, psychosis , schizophrenia, anorexia nervosa and what not , was thoroughly confused. But he thought it better to heed the advice of the wise doc.
" Ok doc, I will take your leave then. What about your fees?"
" In the reception,over there. Please come back after one month."
" So soon, doc?"
" The price of keeping well, Mr. Sharma. Now if you would kindly excuse me, there is the next patient waiting."
Mr. Sharma took his leave.Thus ended the consultation.
( composed by me....dedicated to doctors. No offences please. All in humour and jest. Laughter is the best medicine)
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